Hating the gift

Lisa met Johny in a comment section for a post about a new pair of shoes that, for a couple of days, everyone seemed to talk about. They discussed and bonded over their shared hatred for the original poster -- who, in their opinion, wasn't cultured enough to voice their opinions. They quickly started talking more and developed a close relationship rooted in complaining about pop culture; they fancied themselves unique. However close they might have been, their physical distance did not help to resolve their otherwise lonely and empty existence. Generally, most distances are reachable. Unfortunately for them, a human could not travel this route. It just was not possible. But when Johny went to the post office to send back a recently no longer trendy sweater (he had ordered it when it was still stylish, it arrived late and now clearly wasn't,) he noticed that he could fit into the grandest allowed box. So he shipped himself to Lisa, but the moment their eyes met, they found another shared thing they could hate -- each other.